Apologising is hard to do, really hard. Sometimes one won’t ever be forthcoming and forgiveness should be offered anyway.
But I have a very low tolerance level for non apology apologies, also known as the “if apology”. If someone is going to apologise it should be real, not a clever wordplay that makes someone think they’ve been apologised to when really they’ve been patronised or had the blame shifted to them.
Classic examples include saying “I’m sorry that you feel that way” or “mistakes were made” or “I’m sorry if I’ve upset you.” None of these are actually apologies.
Of course, the words don’t always matter, genuine remorse does. When on the receiving end of an apology, we must take into account what we know of the person and the situation.
But for yonks I’ve wanted to start a section of this blog for non apology apologies and this doozer came my way today!
Head teacher Lynn Small apologised for “any inaccuracies” in the [earlier] letter, and asked parents to disregard the original letter.
(Extra points in this one for the lack of apology for using Comic Sans.)